I did hope that I would at least be able to wander the non essential shops by the time my birthday came around, but I think we all knew that was never going to happen. I wasn’t thinking about doing anything big on my birthday even if were not in lockdown during a global pandemic, to be honest. I’m not one for wanting to mark my milestones with a massive party or some other big event. I was getting the “what are you going to do for your 40th?” questions from some quarters when I was 37, for goodness sake.
I wish that I had managed to get a bit further with the “Things I want to do before I’m 40” list before old Rona came along, but I suppose it just gives me more reason to try and work on them again when all this is over (because it will be, my friends). In the meantime, I will spend tomorrow indoors, in the warmth, stuffing my face with cake and watching more TV than I should be doing. However I might decide to go for a walk too if it’s not too cold.
(Also what is all this about people in my country sharing themselves walking in the snow barefoot on social media? Why would you do that?)
As of the 29th April, I’ve taken to writing a post by hand and posting a photo of it rather than typing it all out. Mainly out of pure laziness, but also because I don’t have my laptop at the moment. Here’s what I wrote:
In addition to the above:
I’ve started to crave Maltesers, Salt and Vinegar Square crisps, Haribo Starmix and Strawberry Hubba Bubba. Not together, obviously. Yes, I know I could go out and get them but I’m reserving my time out of the house for actual essentials.
I listened to the radio show of The Mighty Boosh on BBC Sounds. Now I’m wanting to watch the TV series again. Remind myself of the nights when BBC Three was actually on TV and I’d stay up to watch and admire this work of crazy genius (and, ahem, Noel Fielding. Well he was weirdly attractive).
I rate my mood out of five on most days as a two. Moving to a 3.5 later on in the day.
I need to get off twitter completely for a bit. Even reducing my amount of time checking it isn’t doing me much good.
I have only gone out of the house five times (excluding the times I’ve been in the garden) since lockdown began.
I have watched far too much Homes Under The Hammer.
I realised Aggretsuko is my spirit animal minus the singing of death metal at karaoke. I don’t do karaoke, but I have fantasised about screaming “YOU’RE A SHITTY BOSS!!!!!! I HATE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!” at former horrible managers.
I have taken part in a 30 day song challenge on Instagram. Normally I find these kind of challenges on any social media platform incredibly annoying but it is something to relieve the boredom. And it is interesting to find out what others I follow who are doing it post.
I got three letters from the hospital on the same day (two of them being the same letter). One was the dreaded letter telling me I was in the “at risk” group with me having a long term health condition and saying I should shield for 12 weeks. The other letter(s) were from my consultant which included a form to self assess my level of risk. The higher the score, the higher the risk. My score? 0. Therefore I don’t have to fully shield and can follow the social distancing protocols. Yes I’m confused, but thinking about it I’d rather have got the letters than not. It shows they’re looking out for us.
My anxiety has been through the roof.
I am grateful to live in the time of video calls and messaging apps.
I’ve reduced my twitter consumption if only to stop myself from getting upset and angry at 5G truthers and all other assorted idiots that are in overdrive during this time.
I’ve also reduced my Facebook time for the same reason. Thankfully, I don’t have many friends on there and the majority of them don’t engage with that kind of nonsense.
I believe Disney + came along at just the right time. And yes, The Mandalorian is magnificent.
I’m still meh about Killing Eve.
I downloaded Disney Sorcerer’s Arena on my phone. I deleted it after two days as it drained my phone battery faster than Fallout Shelter did a few years back. Good game though. That reminds me, I need to get a new phone when this is all over.
I also downloaded Incredibox. You have to pay for it, but it is a fun little app.
Been using Noted to empty my head of thoughts. Some potential blog material which I might share, then again might not.
I wrote about lockdown and ended up turning it into some weird poem that I’m kind of equal parts proud and embarrassed about.
I know that right now things seem more than a bit weird. You might also be finding it a tad overwhelming at the moment, what with the near constant stream of information (and misinformation) that is coming through every day from media outlets. It’s natural that you will be worried about your friends and your family, especially all those who are at high risk. I know right now my own priority is ensuring that myself and my own family are safe and healthy.
If there is one piece of advice I can give to you in a situation like this is, don’t stress yourself out. Stress doesn’t just affect your mental health, it puts a strain on your physical health too. It can impact on your immune system, making you more susceptible to colds and other illnesses. So even if you don’t pick up coronavirus, you could still pick up something else. Be aware of what’s going on, keep yourself informed, keep washing your hands (it’s very important), but please don’t let your attempts at protecting yourself from this virus mess up your health in other ways. It really isn’t worth it.
In the meantime, if you’re feeling a little more anxious than usual at the moment, take time for yourself as much as possible. Also:
Mute anything or anyone on social media that is posting negativity. Better still, take a break from social media altogether, it works wonders.
Restrict your news consumption. Having BBC News 24 on all day when you’re already feeling down will just make you feel worse, as will following news sites on twitter all day. Check the news once a day, any time apart when you wake up or before you go to bed. Maybe even get a newspaper (yes they still exist) just avoid the S*n or Daily Fail.
Try a mindfulness app. I’ve found that using Headspace has helped me a lot when I have had bouts of stress and anxiety. I particularly recommend their sleepcasts if you’re having difficulty sleeping.
Sleep well. Eat healthily. Exercise. Read. Listen to music and podcasts you love, or discover new ones to enjoy. Watch your favourite films and TV. Play games. Have a go making that thing you’ve said you wanted to make but have never had the time to. If you are having to self- isolate at this time, now you’ve a chance to do it.
Be kind to your body and mind. Remember life still goes on, just in a different way from what you’re used to.
Hi. So originally I was going to make this a really short post about how I feelblogging is different these days. I ended up writing about my own journey as a blogger and it has turned out longer than I anticipated. In fact, I am still writingit. So I thought it would be a great idea to turn it into a mini series on here. I know you’re excited.
Here’s the first part of this post. Expect the second sometime later this week. Enjoy the read.
changed so much since I started doing it back in the day. When I started,
people were doing it as a hobby. It was an online diary. People used it to talk
about their lives, share the things that they were up to and what interested them.
They also used them to rant a fair bit and post the results of quizzes they did
when they were bored and should have been doing something constructive. Or at
least, I did.
In the days
I first started to blog, MySpace was in existence. I didn’t sign up for a profile
until about 2006 and I was probably getting on a bit to have one even then
(reader, I was 25). I did post some blogs on there but not often. I thought it was
a bit crap if you wanted to use it as a blog space but ok for the occasional
My first blog
proper, was on Blogger. I’d looked at all the various blog platforms, including
LiveJournal and one called 20Six but I settled on Blogger because it seemed
like the easiest to set up at the time. I used the blog to post about my interests
and what I’d been doing to begin with, then started to use it as a platform to
let off steam about anything in the news or in my life that had pissed me off
that day. Towards the end, I ended up doing various online quizzes such as “Which
Muppet are you?” and “What superpower should you have?” and sharing the results
as I had no idea what to write about. My first blog, which I can’t remember the
name of, let alone the url, was eventually abandoned and left to float into the
darkest depths of cyberspace.
My interest in blogging, though, hadn’t
entirely gone with it…
For reasons that I won’t go into a lot of detail on here, I am looking for another job. I have said in the past that was going to look for one and never really acted on it. Well I really am this time.
I’ve been spending time every day on the job search. I’ve worked on my CV, I’ve uploaded it to more than one job site so I can use it the moment I see something I’m interested in. I’ve printed a couple of copies that I could hand in to places I see looking to hire people. So far, my search has come to nothing. In the meantime, I’ve got people who, while they absolutely mean well, are in my ear telling me about vacancies they’ve seen and telling me I should apply to them. Even if it means me getting the tram in the morning. I have experienced getting the tram in the morning rush hour and, yeah it’s not something I want to experience on a regular basis (FYI, I don’t drive).
To be honest, after so many years in my current job, I’m ready for something different, not simply doing the same thing in a different place. Recently, I’ve felt like I’ve been going through the motions in my job and realised a long time ago that there was little to no chance of progression while I was still doing it. I’ve also decided that, whatever I do next, I don’t want to be having to be on my feet as often as I have been in this one. I want to be able to do something without my arthritic knees being aggravated from having to stand up for the best part of an eight-hour shift. However, the more I trail the job sites, the more I wonder whether I’ve left it too late to change career path, or am I going to have to consider moving away in order to get a decent job.
I suppose if I am unable to get a job straight away I can always use the time to learn to drive, brush up on some skills or maybe do stuff for peanuts online. In the meantime, I’ll just keep on looking.